Tag: music

1901

As anyone who knows me personally (or even vaguely, to be completely honest with you) can attest, I am not a people person. I’m actually really, really bad with human beings. I’m constantly irritated by the shit people think they can do and say, and I think that’s why I prefer blogging, texting, or writing to actually talking to people. Honestly, there are only a few people I know who I haven’t completely alienated in the past three years, and some of those are slipping away from me as we speak. Er, as I type.

But anyway, I didn’t decided to post today to flounder under the weight of my own pathetic people skills. Nope, today I want to blather on about rain.

You heard me right.

It’s been raining pretty constantly the past couple weeks here, and I always get into a contemplative mood when the weather is like this. Last night I was curled up in a blanket, reading Beautiful Chaos, and the only noise in my room was the rustling of pages and the steady tap-tap-tap of the rain on my roof. I was feeling extremely Zen.

When I read, I get into this… mood. I’m either oblivious to the world or completely focused on every little detail around me, and yesterday was a strange mix of the two. I had to keep pausing as I read because the rain lulled me into a daze and I would just stare at the same sentence for a couple seconds before realizing what I was doing.

I get like that a lot when it’s raining. I also sleep better, because the pitter-patter beats out a tune and I just crash. On top of that, my dreams are more intense and more realistic.

I really like the rain. I like how it feels on my head when I run into the high school from the parking lot. I like how it sounds when it’s coming at the house sideways and beats against the windows in the keeping room. I like how it looks as it splatters on the lake at the Dagley’s house.

I just really love rain.

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Our Thunderous Silences

This was written for Writing 201: Poetry

High school:

A cacophony of deafening personalities,

Everyone racing,

Competing,

Fighting for individuality

In the midst of a war

That cannot end.

If we had nothing to battle,

What would we do

With our emerging identities?

In a symphony of adolescent instrumentals,

I am the piano,

Dancing quietly below the louder instruments,

Just soft enough to remain underneath their notes

But important enough that without me

The entire piece would fall flat

And be reduced to nothing

But useless noise.

I must pay close attention

To every note I play;

One misstep and the piece comes crashing

Down around our sunburned ears.

No matter how cautious I am,

There will always be the one line

That my fingers stumble over:

I’ve learned to keep moving,

Keep playing,

And smile like I haven’t royally fucked up.

Red Hands

((NOTE: To skip all of the introductory whatever in the video, skip to 2:03.))

I think I ought to admit, right off the bat, that I write all of my blog posts, poems, short stories, novellas, books, etc while listening to music. Or, at least, I try to do so; music always helps my thoughts flow much easier between my brain and my fingers. On top of that, a lot of my poems and all of my posts have titles that are either song lyrics or titles (usually the latter; it’s just so much easier).

I got chewed out for that today, and I’m still reeling.

I was singing Troye Sivan’s The Fault In Our Stars (the song above) under my breath and one of my on-again-off-again friends, Bryn, happened to overhear me.  When I told her the title of the song I was singing, Bryn flipped shit. She went off about people not being creative enough to come up with their own damn work for God’s sake, and I’ll admit I was a little affronted. First of all, I think TFIOS is a really good song, though honestly nothing about it is particularly amazing. Second, I think Troye Sivan is alright naming his song after the book he literally wrote it about. And finally, like I said, I do almost the exact same thing all the time.

I tried to explain all of this to her (calmly, if I do say so myself), but she just shut me down and it actually really ticked me off. I view reusing titles the same way I do fanfiction: it’s extremely easy to mess up, but it’s also flattering. I mean, I wouldn’t suggest naming your book The Fault In Our Stars or anything (that might not go over well), but a song? No big deal. Besides, Troye Sivan isn’t some huge popstar with a million zillion fangirls; he’s just a Youtuber who happens to have a decent sized fan base.

I don’t know, maybe I was overreacting. At least I didn’t yell at her like I absolutely wanted to.